A poem by Mary Oliver…
Song of Autumn…
In the deep fall
don’t you imagine the leaves think how comfortable it will be to touch
the earth instead of the
nothingness of air and the endless
freshets of wind? And don’t you think
the trees themselves, especially those with mossy, warm caves, begin to think
of the birds that will come — six, a dozen — to sleep inside their bodies? And don’t you hear
the goldenrod whispering goodbye,
the everlasting being crowned with the first
tuffets of snow? The pond
vanishes, and the white field over which the fox runs so quickly brings out
its blue shadows. And the wind pumps its bellows. And at evening especially,
the piled firewood shifts a little,
longing to be on its way.
Some autumn photos from these last few weeks…
Champlain Lookout in the Gatineau Park, Quebec. A must see if you are ever in the area… especially at sunset it’s spectacular. We drove there late that afternoon with my parents, the view was stunning.
My parents celebrated their 59th wedding anniversary late September. My sister took them out touring for a three days that week. I was able to join them on two of those days. We were incredibly grateful that Mom’s health and strength improved somewhat, it made so many things possible for them to enjoy that week. The break did them a world of good I feel.
On that day we drove through downtown Ottawa showed them some familiar places, and then in the Gatineau Park. It was such a gorgeous day, actually each of those days they were out was really nice out.
There was so much laughter going on that my face was aching by the end of that day. I was extremely grateful to have had this opportunity to take my parents out for those few days with my sister. Memories were made and they’ll be cherished for a long time to come.
Farmer’s fields close to home, love the colours…
And below is Cooper Marsh Conservation Area. Both my husband and I remember going there on a school trip with our kids when they were quite young. I believe our daughter was maybe in grade 2 at the time. So that’s many, many moons ago, and we hadn’t been back since.
What a beautiful place to visit…
I was really missing our daughter that day. I wished she could have been there with us. Life has changed for her drastically in these past few years… and for all of us. Not that many years ago we all hiked trails together, and even climbed a small mountain on the west coast together while we had vacationed there. Now that a wheelchair is needed for her with the condition she is dealing with, it doesn’t make any of this possible… and it probably won’t for some time.
There are days where I feel like my heart has been shattered into millions of tiny pieces, feeling broken, yet still beating like it always has. So much has changed in our lives. Grieving pays me a visit some days and learning to sit with that grief and the pain is absolutely needed so it can be processed and let go. I’m learning how to create new ways of being, of seeing and doing things. Yet it’s not always easy to let go of what was and the dreams, when I can’t see what will become. But there’s no choice, because we are being un-done at the seams of who we thought we were.
So I’m practicing letting go and trusting God for all that is unfolding. My wild guess is that God certainly knows and sees the bigger picture in all of this better than I do. So I ask Him for guidance, support, and ask Him to heal my heart and piece it back together in a new and better way so that I can allow each beat to drum me into accepting more deeply this new life that I need to accept and create that will be more enriching.
By going out in nature it’s helping me to believe that perhaps in some odd or funny way this is all good, maybe even perfect just as it is.
A few photos from our backyard… and the little creek that runs through our community.
The light in the dark of the forest… oranges and reds I never, ever get tired of it…
Wild mushrooms in the forest were so incredibly beautiful…
This little mushroom looking up at us… all he’s missing is a happy smile!! 🙂