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Cottage time — suzanne-mcrae.com

Cottage time

I had a plan for this week… I wanted to escape with our son to my sister’s cottage for a mini-vacation, for 3 days. My first plan was to leave Monday morning and return only this evening. But my plans were changed when I received a phone call last week saying I had to go for the MRI on Monday, which turned out a week sooner than I had been told it would be.

After a weekend filled with anxiety, and the better part of Monday I was really ready to give myself a small break, to go and rest and recharge my batteries before more appointments start.

It was cloudy and raining when we left yesterday. It looked like it was going to be a rainy kind of day, which was going to be a perfect lazy day for at the cottage. But 10 minutes after leaving home the clouds disappeared and the sun came out for us. I was thankful either way. During the drive up there I did a lot of EFT (tapping)… until my son told me to put my hands down. That’s a first, usually he doesn’t mind when I do tapping while driving. (note: if you ever meet up with someone tapping on their head, face points you will know who it is).

We no sooner arrived at the cottage that I saw that I had a few messages on my cell phone, one being the surgeon’s office they wanted to see me today for the MRI results. I had to tell them that I wouldn’t be able to make it, and that I was away for the next day and a bit. I was giving myself this next day to do what I needed to. The next consultation would have to wait.

Cottage time

When I saw that the results were already in and that the surgeon would be talking to me soon, I kind of panicked. I knew that I had to read the breast cancer booklets she had given me at my first appointment. I needed to prepare for this next visit. So I sat down and read one booklet. Surprising but it didn’t trigger me at all like I thought it might. I was able to read it and feel ok doing so. Then I tackled the next two books and read up to the part about the surgery. I decided to skip over the sections about treatment and recovery since I’m not there. One step at a time and that felt better. I had not been ready at all until yesterday to look at those books. I just didn’t want to face this. I did anything else but look at those books. So now I have pages of questions which I will be condensing before my appointment now scheduled for next week. I’m ready.

While at the cottage I felt like I was royalty, a Queen. My sister did all the meal preparation and even serving me at every opportunity she could find. I had lots of time to read and rest and do whatever else I wanted to do in our short visit there.

I also took time to prepare notes to discuss with my new Naturopathic Doctor that I will meet soon at the Integrative Cancer Centre. I also prepared information and questions for a few meetings this week about services for our son.

I woke up Tuesday morning and my anxiety was all gone. It made it easier to do what I needed to without the anxiety. I didn’t take the time to colour in my mindfulness colouring book, but my sister had me doing a mindful check-in meditation with her reminding me that I had those on my laptop and no excuse to not do a few a day. I felt so light after. Just pausing for 15 minutes focusing on something other than the busy energy in my head, and this felt so awesome.

This morning I woke up to the sounds of the waves from the lake crashing against shore. One of the most healing sounds for me. We went down by the lake to drink our hot lemon drink before breakfast and to talk… as my son still slept. We felt good to have several hours to ourselves.

This afternoon I laid down in the hammock and had a nap for a bit. Then when I came back up to the cottage before leaving my sister gave me a reflexology treatment. She also gifted me a binder full of nutritional advice she pulled together for me from her certified nutritionist course she took a few years back. This will be so helpful in combination with what the Naturopath will be giving me. All of it will really help me to be able to keep going with a healthy eating plan, with whole foods.

The 29 hours that I was at the cottage felt like I had been gone for 3 or 4 days. It also felt like it was Christmas the whole time I was there pretty much. One gift after another. I’m very thankful for my little sister and the incredible support she is giving me.

Before bed last night I was reading A Place of Healing: Wrestling with the Mysteries of Suffering, Pain, and God’s Sovereignty. I managed to read just a few pages before drifting off to sleep. As I read those few pages what I was reading helped me shift my energy, my thoughts really empowering me.

Divine Healing: Continuous faith and unceasing prayer

“It is only when you go to God and receive His healing power that the life energy is directed into the atoms of the bodily cells and produces instantaneous healing.”

Reading those few pages really helped me believe that I can do this. That I am not alone and that God is there walking with me, guiding me and helping me to heal, and that I can shift my focus and energy (and I did), and that I can go through what is needed and heal from this. I was able to drift off to sleep easily with those words anchored in my consciousness… believe that anything is possible as long as I invite God into this whole experience.

So 29 hours later I am back, rejuvenated and changed in so many ways and grateful beyond words.

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  1. It sounds like there’s been a shift for you, Suzanne. Putting your trust in your body’s ability to heal is huge. Remember that it all starts with love. xo

  2. Something you might want to listen to. http://drmiller.com/laskow/

  3. Beautiful shift! Thank you for sharing, Suzanne. You loved yourself and let yourself be loved. That’s where the power is, because God IS love. big hugs to you, my friend! ♥
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